For The Love Of Leah
by sinabella
Summary: Leah imprints on Derek but can she be Dereks girl? When she is stronger and faster then him and that she is the knight in shining armour and he is the princess. Can Derek love her? Will she get her happy ending? Read and please Review!
1. Chapter 1

For The Love Of Leah,

I do not own any of the twilight characters. Disclaimer.

Leah s POV.

I stared in the mirror. My brown hair had been straightened, my eyebrows plucked and my feet had been pushed into heels. The girl in the mirror looked so different from the one who ran with the wolves normally. Being a wolf wasn t so bad most of the time, now that I was the Beta and that Jacob organised all the patrolling. Jacob did me a favour and made sure I never ran with Sam which was a relief. I still found it hard to see him looking at Emily and not me. Sam s wedding was only a week away now and Emily was asking me to do all theses stupid tasks. It was so annoying because I had always imagined myself in the white dress with Sam at the alter but now Emily had taken my place. It was hard but that's life. Jacob understood my pain but was so happy with Nessie that he barely noticed it and now Seth, my own brother had imprinted. I wanted to run but I wasn t Jacob and I knew it did nothing.

"Leah" I looked up. It was my mom. "Come on, we don t want to be late." Late, I didn t even want to go. It was so annoying. Paul and Rachel were having a housewarming party. Another happy imprint story. They loved each other and Billy was delighted Rachel was staying around La Push. I looked in the mirror again and sighed, it didn't t matter what I wore, none of the guys would notice and Sam wouldn't t even look at me, just at Emily. Mom blew the horn and I ran down the stairs and into the car.

Seth was in the back of the car and was not happy. Clio was forbidden to see him and if she disobeyed she would be send to boarding school. I felt so sorry for Seth, he deserved happiness but at least he had an imprint unlike me. Mom talked all the way to Paul's new flat. She was also starting to fall in love with Charlie. It was so annoying that everyone around me was falling in love and I hated Bella and now it looked like she might become my stepsister. Bella was horrible, she hurt Jacob over and over and she couldn't t even be happy for Jacob when he imprinted. She was so selfish and she was a bloodsucker on top of that. Of course, Seth loved them. He liked Bella and he got on great with Edward. I was so glad when we came home and that I didn't t have to protect those bloodsuckers any longer. Still, I was also mad at mom for falling in love because it wasn t so long since Dad was here. I felt a lump in my throat. I missed my dad so much and now Mom was forgetting him and falling for his best friend. I felt the heat shiver down my spine and fought to control myself. Mom didn't t even notice she was too busy talking but Seth did and he gave my shoulder a squeeze.

"Come on. Get out and please Leah be nice to everyone." My mom said and I forced the heat down again. This time she noticed but chose to ignore me, story of my life. Rachel had covered the flat with welcome banners and was standing by the door greeting everyone while Paul stood beside her, playing with her hair. I muttered a hello and went inside. Jared and Kim were sharing a chair and it seemed the same pair of lips. Sam and Emily were talking to Billy and Jacob was standing nearby. He raised his hand at me. I nodded and went over to Quil and Claire.

"Hi Claire, how are you?" I said smiling at her as she pulled Quils hair.

"Lee" She screamed and hugged me. I loved kids and yet I could t have any. It hurt to see parents with children and knowing I could never have any. Claire wanted to play hide and seek so I ended up pushing myself in to the parlour, only problem was someone else was there.

I

"Ow" he groaned. A man looked at me. He had short blonde hair and big blue eyes. I felt breathless as I felt my life clinging to him. He was my sun, my air and my world. He was stunning. He was tall and had wide shoulders. I stared at him.

"So why are you in the parlour?" He said and chuckled.

I realised I was staring at him and blushed. "Sorry, I was playing hide and seek" I said, trying not to stare. It was very hard because he was so handsome.

"Arant you a bit old?" He said laughing.

His laugh sounded so nice and I started laughing too. "I was playing with Claire. She three."

"Ok. You can hide with me anytime but right now I think I had better bring Rachel her cream."

He walked out and I collapsed against the wall. I had imprinted with…I don't even know his name. Who is he? "Gotcha" Claire screamed. Quil was behind her and he gave a questioning glance as I pulled myself together. Claire was to busy looking in a jar to notice me. "Are you okay?" Quil asked.

"No" I replied. "I have to go" and with that I ran. "Leah" Quil screamed after me. I ran into the sitting room and everyone looked up. They had all heard Quil shouting my name and now I had sprinted in. "Leah" Sam said. I looked round, he wasn t here. Where was he? I ran into the next room and then searched the house but he was gone and no-one knew who I was talking about. Sam and Emily were giving me worried glances while my mom was saying it was lack of sleep. They thought I had imagined this guy. My fury was too much. I felt my hands shivering and I ran into the forest.

Derek's POV.

I was so tired but I had to go to this stupid party and deliver the food. My dad owned a food company and I was his pathetic delivery boy. I wanted to go to college but the fees were too high and Dad wouldn't t let me go because he wanted me to take over the company. It sucked, I wanted to be a doctor and save lives not be stuck selling food. I looked at the clock, I was late.

I jumped into the van and started the engine. It was a big order, must be a lot of people eating. The address was in La Push. I drove down and tried to ignore my phone as it was dad calling to check up on me as usual. I got to the flat and pulled out the food. There was a lot of food but when I got to the flat, there were only about ten or twelve people inside. Rachel Black told me to put most of it in the kitchen except for the meat which was going in the parlour and could I get the cream out of the parlour while I was at it. What did she think I was her servant. If she wasn t a customer and didn't t have Paul as a boyfriend I would have told her to shut up and go away. I found the parlour and bent down to get the cream when someone bumped into me.

It was a girl. She was very pretty and she looked embarrassed, I decided to break the tension and ask why she too was in Rachel s too small parlour. She was playing hide and seek, she obviously loved kids. When I had a family, I wanted lots of kids. I looked her over, she was tall for a girl but that was good because I was tall for a guy. I realised I was still holding the cream and left her. It wasn t until I was outside that I realised who she was. I got into the car and drove away leaving Leah Clearwater behind me. Leah Clearwater, she was a mess or so I had heard but she had not looked a mess in fact she had looked amazing. Everyone had heard her sob story about how her cousin Emily stole her boyfriend. Sam was a jerk and Leah deserved better. I remembered her sweet face and cursed Sam for making her unhappy. I stopped the car. I was at home. Great.

Dad was happy with the business and how we were having a good season. He spend dinner talking about developments. I tuned out and thought about Leah. I don t know when I would see her again. Did I want to see her again? I mean everyone says she's moody and she beat up some guys last week with her brother. Man, I hate girls. "Of course, we have the wedding next week" Dad continued.

It was Sam Uleys wedding which meant Leah would be there and I would be wearing a stupid caterers uniform. How sad. I could try to avoid her but I wanted to see her even though she has no idea who I am.

After dinner, I went into my room and began my homework. I tried to concentrate but Leah s face kept coming into my mind. She had looked so beautiful in that parlour especially when she blushed and her smile was so sweet and innocent. How could Sam leave her but maybe she was going out with one of the guys in the La Push gang, I mean she spend all her time with the group of guys. She couldn't be going out with Jared because he was Kim's and definitely not Sam but maybe Jacob, Quil or Embry. They were younger then her but they looked older. I struggled to calm the jealousy that Leah might be going out with them. It was hard because I wanted to be her guy. Did she like me? I mean she had stared at me and she had blushed. I hoped she did. I would watch her in school maybe talk to her but I would have to see how she was with the guys and whether she was going out with one of them. I threw my maths book aside and got into bed, trying to remember Leah's face.

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I looked around as I approached the school. I could see Jared and Kim but not Leah. Maybe she was sick, I hope not. Then I heard a laugh. It was Jacobs, Leah and Seth were getting out of his car. Did that mean she was Jacobs girl? Or was it just lifts. Then she looked up and saw me. She smiled. It was a beautiful smile that made me feel like I had given her everything in the world. Had I caused that smile?

"Hey" She said. Jacob and Seth were looking at me.

"Hi, can I.. can I walk you to class?" I was nervous. I had meant to start with a casual conversation not ask can I walk her to class and I had stumbled over the words. I m such a loser.

"Yes" She said. I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled. I took her bag off her shoulder.

"What are you doing?" She said surprised.

"I m carrying your bag for you, if you don t mind." I said. This was a test would she let me carry her things. Did she trust me to?

"Oh, thank you ." She said and took my hand that wasn t carrying her bag. Her hand was so warm but small. Her hand fit perfectly in mine. I smiled before I remembered it wasn t cool. I walked her through the corridors trying to ignore the gossip behind this motion. When I reached her classroom, I gave her her bag but kept holding her hand. She smiled.

"Thank you" She said, still smiling. I loved that smile. "Heres your reward." She said and kissed my cheek. My pulse quickened and I watched her walk away with regret. My hand was cold without hers and I felt empty. The bell rang and I left for class.

Leah's POV.

I watched him, walk away. He was so amazing and he smelled so good that would teach Sam and the pack that I am not delusional that my imprint is real. His name was Derek Sullivan. I had seen it on his backpack. I smiled as I remembered Jacob and Seth watching me walking away holding hands with Derek. I hated Chemistry but I had good chemistry with Derek. What a bad joke, no wonder I had not been happy but now I was. Paul sat down next to me and gave me a stupid grin. Paul was one reason I hated Chemistry, he was my lab partner. "So?" Luckily the bell rang and I managed to avoid Paul. Although Jacob, Embry and Jared kept giving me looks and the teacher caught Embry miming kissing. Embry got detention and was humiliated, it was sweet. I couldn't wait for lunchtime but would he be there and would he want to eat lunch with me?.

The bell for break rang out. I ran for my locker. Seth was standing there. "So, Derek s your imprint. I'm so happy for you?" He said and smiled. Seth was such a happy guy and he always shared his happiness. I could tell his words were sincere but I didn't t want to talk about it.

"Yep, now why don t you go to the canteen? I ll follow you in a sec, just need to drop off some books." Seth kept smiling, nodded and walked off.

I watched him go and smiled. It was becoming a habit to smile now. Weird because up until recently I hadn t smiled a lot but I knew Derek was responsible for it. I opened my locker and a note fell out.

"Leah,

Meet me in the library for lunch.

Derek X"

I think my heart just exploded. I was having lunch with Derek. It was so amazing. Oh my gosh, I m late. After talking to Seth and now my locker, I was five minutes late. I slammed the locker shut and ran all the way to the library. When I entered, a few students looked up. It was so quiet and I could hear my heavy breathing. I looked around. Derek stood by the back door. He was leaning against it and the sun was shining behind him. It was the perfect picture. My heart swelled with love. "Hey." I said, smiling at my greeting which captured none of what I felt. His brown eyes twinkled with excitement.

"I thought you were not going to come." He said.

"I m here." I said firmly. "Where are we eating?"

"Outside, in the stone garden." He said it like a question and I nodded. The stone garden was a stone area with a few potted plants and a bench. Students were supposed to come here for prayer and peace. We ate our sandwiches in silence, we just looked at one another. It was like I could see into his soul and he could see into mine. His hand pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear. "Thank you".

"Leah, I felt as if I know you already but you don t know me. I m not a good person or I use to not be. When I was younger, I used to lie to everyone about everything. It became a habit and I lost the respect of all the people I knew. It wasn t till I was fifteen that I stopped and starting telling the truth. I just want you to know that." I smiled.

"Derek, thank you for telling me." I said feeling sorry for him because he had suffered but proud of him for telling me and for fighting against the lies.

"I told you because I want to be honest with you, Leah. You make me feel so happy and I know this sounds stupid because we barely know each other but like I m in love. But Leah, will you be honest with me?"

I looked at his eyes. Could I tell him I am a werewolf? Yes I could but not now in school. I'll tell him tonight. "Yes, Derek. I will." He smiled.

The rest of lunch went quickly. We talked about everything, our likes and our dislikes. Derek played soccer but hated watching it. His favourite colour was green and he loved old movies. We spend fifteen minutes deciding whether Casablanca was in fact the greatest movie of all time. I loved that movie and so did he and when we left, he quoted Casablanca. "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship." I smiled and said "Just friends?". He laughed and kissed me on the lips. It was brief, soft and sweet and full of love. Then he walked away. Now I was at home, trying to figure out how to tell him.

There was a knock on the door. I opened the door and stared taking in his beauty. He stood still and stared back at me then he pulled me close and kissed the top of my head. "Shall we sit down?" I said. He nodded and he sat down on the sofa. I went to sit next to him but he pulled me on top of him. We began to kiss. The kisses went deeper and I knew I had to tell him now I remembered. "Derek." I said breathlessly. "I have to tell you something."

Derek's POV.

Man, I loved Leah. Apart from being hot, she was funny, smart and kind. We got along great. Lunch had been fantastic. We had talked so much and we only stopped to stare at one another. It was like we had some connection and this connection made it so hard to be away from her. I had to be near her every second otherwise I was in pain and I had to be touching her. I wondered what she had to say. She looked serious.

"I m a werewolf" She said. I looked at her. It was obvious she was serious and she started talking about vampires and stuff. Leah was a wolf who fought vampires. Did I want to be a part of this freak show? She was strong, fast and ate lots. She did not need me to protect her. I wanted a girl who would look to me to fight her dragons. I wanted to be the knight in shining armour but being with Leah would mean I was the princess. She also spend all her time with other wolves like Jacob and Embry. I needed to breathe. Then I looked at her and I knew I could deal with it for the moment. I kissed her and told her it was ok.

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After I left Leah s house, I walked into the forest and sat down. It wasn t long before Sam, Paul and Embry came. Sam explained about secrecy and stuff. Then he phrased. The man turned into a wolf and he turned back to a naked man. Leah had seen all the guys naked, all the guys had seen Leah naked. Suddenly, the whole thing freaked me out. I took deep breaths. Sam stared at me. I panicked. "Look man, tell Leah. I liked her a lot but I don t want to be part of this freak show. Werewolves and vampires. Its weird, too weird." I didn't t mention that them seeing Leah naked freaked me out or that I didn't t want to play princess. They stared at me. Then Sam hit me in the face, I fell backwards. Paul kicked me.

"I loved Leah. She deserves better then you. She s not a freak and neither are we." Sam said. "And if you know what's good for you, you will say nothing to nobody. Understood?"

I nodded. "Good because otherwise we will pay you a visit." Paul said. The three of them looked at me.

"I won t breathe a word about werewolves or vampires, I swear. " I said and ran. I heard Embry shout "We will be watching"

I am never going near Leah and her pack again. Never. She hot and sweet and kind but she s not worth this. Is she? I heard a howl in the distance.

Leahs POV.

So Derek was ok with the werewolf thing. He said it was fine nut I had a bad feeling. Then I smelled it. Theres a vampire, a new born. Head to the east. I yelled. Collin and I were closest. I went for the kill.

Authors Note.

Will Derek go back to Leah and if he does will it be too late. Please review, hoped u liked it.


	2. Chapter 2

Leah s POV.

Collin was closer and reached him first. The vampire heard him and spun round. The vampire was tall and thin. He had the body of a sixteen year old. It was immediately obvious that the vampire was very strong and only one or two years old. This was Collins first fight with a new born. Collin went for the easy kill and the vampire knocked him down with a single blow before he could do any more damage to Collin, I pounced. I bit his shoulder. I had become a better fighter recently but this vampire was amazing. I could only hope the rest of the pack would come soon. He leaped at me and I dodged, trying to remember what the Cullens had taught us about newborns.

"Hold on, Leah." I heard Seth yell. It distracted me and that was all it took a second lost of concentration and I was down. It would take the rest of the pack about three minutes to get here. Lots of time for damage, I tried to cling to consciousness and to fight. The vampire realised his fate.

"There are others coming." He mumbled. "Not enough time to run." I managed a weak growl.

"A hostage." He muttered. He grabbed the back of my neck and began dragging me towards the cliff. I blacked out.

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Why did my bed hurt so much and my arm? My arm hurt a lot and I couldn t feel my legs . I let out a small groan and opened my eyes with an effort. I was in a small cave near the cliffs. Why was I here? Maybe I had been cliff-diving and had an accident. No, that wasn t it. What was it? What had I forgotten? It was something important and dangerous. Then I smelled him, a vampire. The smell was familiar and the memory came back. The vampire had hurt Collin and me but where was Collin and the rest of the pack. The vampire looked at me, realising I was awake.

"Your awake. Pity. I preferred you unconscious. Your pack is outside and your future is in danger. I will let you go if they let me leave untouched but if they refuse to let me go, then I will bite you." The vampire was already too familiar to me, his voice and scent. I hid my fear and tried to growl but couldn't t His voice was too deep and loud. I wanted to tell him that I would let myself go but I couldn't t. Then I heard the voices in my mind, I had been too confused and in pain to notice them before. I could hear the pack. I heard Seth first.

"Seth, what's happening?" I felt Seth's overwhelming joy when he heard me in his thoughts but why was he so happy I was alive? Had I been out that long? Then I heard Sam.

"Leah, listen to me, don t try to fight., The vampire is keeping you hostage hoping he can escape without us killing him."

Sam kept on talking but I was distracted by a memory of Paul s. It was Derek, but why did Paul have a memory of Derek. They were in the woods and the memory was recent, very recent. Derek was saying I was a freak and that he didn't want to be with me. Rejection washed through me then Sam realised what was happening. Before, they could pity me and my rejection, I phrased. It was so painful. My werewolf body had been in the middle of healing itself and had not been ready to phrase. The physical pain and the emotional pain of Derek rejecting me caused me to black out again. I hoped it would be a long time before I woke up again.

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I woke up again with a metallic taste in my mouth. It was blood. Then I realised I was biting my lip to stop tears coming. I wanted to see Derek again and live. I did not want to die in this cave. I was panicking, I needed to stay calm. I took deep breaths. The vampire looked down at me on the ground.

"A female. Incredible. Are you the only female or are there many of you? You are quite pretty for a wolf?" He said in deep tone, looking at me with interest through his red eyes.

I was insulted, quite pretty and so what if I was a female, it was none of his business. I let out a growl. This was quite sore but effective. He stared at me then we heard the pack barking. I could hear Seth's bark, it was his happy bark. I guess with me being human, they did not know what was happening in here. Then I felt a blow to the head. "Silence is golden." He said laughing as I moaned in pain. I was sure the wolves outside could hear me but they knew not to make a sound. My head hurt so bad, I closed my eyes and could feel myself drifting in and out of consciousness. Sometimes, I was alert and realised the danger I was in and other times, I was lost in memories. I saw my first date with Sam. I remembered choosing the dress and the shoes. The dress was black and left little to the imagination while the shoes were my mothers. Then, I saw my fifteenth birthday, Dad was there and Sam was kissing me, I knew this was the past but it was so sweet. Then I saw me and Derek at my house with Dad. I knew this could t be happening because Dad was dead and Derek thought I was a freak but it was so appealing to let my brain fantasize. I was so confused.

Then, something moved me. I opened my eyes and groaned inside. I was in the cave but the vampire was holding me up. His sickly sweet scent filled my nostrils but no heat came. My body could not survive another middle of healing phrase. The vampire walked out of the cave. His mouth was open, baring fangs and my neck was close to his mouth, bare and unprotected.

Derek's POV.

I came home and collapsed on the bed. Sam had given me a big black eye and my ribs were bruised after Paul. They were very strong, I thought then remembered the werewolf thing. I wondered whether Leah was that strong. She would have to be strong to fight vampires but I know I have a big ego but most guys would prefer to be the fighter and I was one of them. Was I being the bigger man by walking away from Leah? Not really, if I was the bigger guy, I would accept that Leah was stronger then me and accept it. I would t let it scare me off


	3. Chapter 3

Dereks POV.

I looked in the mirror. The guy in the mirror did not look good, he had a black eye and was missing Leah badly. Every second away from her was painful. Then I made a decision. I had had a moment of weakness but now I was ready. I could be the better bigger guy, wait I was the bigger guy. I looked in the mirror, it showed a guy standing tall now and was proud of himself then I jumped out my window. Unfortunately I didnt look out the window before and crashed on my brothers bike. It hurt but I didnt let it slow me down. I got back up ignoring my bruises and grazes and headed for Leahs house.

I got there twenty minutes later. I was a fast runner thanks to soccer training. I ran round the back of the house and looked into Leahs room. It was dark but I could see no-one was in there. I ran round the rest of the house, no-one was home. What now? I had expected her family to be home at ten o clock at night but they were not. Sams house maybe. Everyone knew the La Push gang practically lived there. I looked at her house one last time and ran into the darkness again.

It was obvious something was happening in Sam s house. There was three or four cars. I ran to the door and rang the bell. No-one answered so I went to the window. There were a lot of girls inside. I recognised Clio, Kim, Rachel and Emily. They were gathered round the sofa. Kim moved away and through the glass, I saw a boy of about fifteen lying on the sofa. He looked like he was dead. I knew who he was, he was Collin and the guy beside him is Dr. Cullen. Then I heard Kim shout my name. The others looked up and I realised I was staring in their window. How embarrassing. Emily opened the door.

"Where are all the guys and Leah?" I asked nervously. "Is there a vampire problem?"

Clio looked at me sympathetically. "Yes" Emily said but did not elaborate.

"Is Collin okay?" I asked filling the silence. I wanted to ask whether Leah was ok but I was not sure that I wanted to know the answer to my unasked question.

"He s going to be fine. He s already recovering." Dr. Cullen answered

"Was anyone else injured?" I asked, praying the answer was not Leah. Nobody answered which was the worst answer, they could have given. I could tell from their faces that it was Leah. I took a deep breath.

"Where is she?" I asked looking at the door.

"You can t leave. Leah is being held hostage by a vampire. We don t know the extend of her injuries but she is injured. However, if you go down there, the vampire might feel that we are trying to coax him out or trick him into coming out with a human as bait I.e. you. If he felt like that, there is a good chance, he would kill Leah so you have to stay here." Dr. Cullen said.

"Stay here?" I repeated. "Stay here? Leah is injured and I have to stay here. I said some stuff earlier that I didn t mean and if Leah heard it, she will think I dont love her. That is not true. Leah is the best thing in my life. I love her more then life itself and I need to tell her this." I said. "Where is she?"

"I m sorry, Derek but you have to stay here. You could pass her a message through a werewolf though." Dr. Cullen said.

I threw myself on the sofa and looked at them. Dr. Cullen threw me his cell and I dialled Sam. He answered on the first ring.

"Hello"

"Sam, its me, Derek. Listen I need you to tell Leah that I didn t mean what I said earlier that I had a moment of weakness and that I love her. I love Leah, more than Life itself. Can you tell her that?" I asked nervously. I only now remembered my black eye. Sam had a neat right hook. There was a pause then.

"Ill try" He said gruffly. He did not mention whether she was in wolf form but I presumed she was and hoped she would get the message.

"Sam, bring her back to me please." I ordered then hung up.

The next hour could only be described as being the most painful of my life. I sat next to Clio who held my hand and whispered over and over again that it would be okay. I tried to calm myself by thinking of places I could bring Leah when she came back. This worked for a while then I picked up Emily s photo album. There were several pictures of Leah in it. She was beautiful even when she was a child. Everyone remained silent apart from Emily who repeatedly asked "Who s for tea?".

It was another long hour before Dr. Cullen told us the plan. The wolves were going to let the vampire leave their territory. When the vampire crossed the treaty line, he would meet the Cullen family. The Cullens wanted to fight the vampire as Leah had protected them with Nessie and now they were returning the favour. Dr. Cullen would not be fighting as he would attend to Leah, the second she was free. The plan was going into action in five minutes. I started taking deep breaths. Clio squeezed my hand. Please let Leah be okay, Please let Leah be ok. Leah, I love you please come home.


	4. Chapter 4

Leahs POV.

I looked at the pack as we emerged from the cave, it was early morning. They were all in human form and they were letting him go. I wanted to tell them to attack but I couldn t. I was barely awake as it was. The vampires teeth were by my neck and he held on to me tightly as he walked past, expecting an attack that did not come. I looked at Seth, he looked so sad and then Sam who was trying to keep a poker face but there was pain in is eyes whether it was for me or because he was letting the vampire go, I did not know. I wished Derek was here. Then the vampire started to run. My body felt weak as I watched the trees fly by. I felt sick. I tried to remember Derek, Seth and Mom and concentrated on seeing Dad again to stop the fear. I could see the treaty line coming up and as he approached it, he threw me away like a broken toy. I was of no further use to the vampire.

I was suspended in mid-air for a couple of seconds then I crashed painfully into a tree. I heard a crack but my body was in so much pain, I could not register what had broken. I fought to resist the darkness. Then I heard noises and looked up. I could see just beyond the treaty-line the Cullens were fighting him, the vampire. It only lasted a second then the blond guy, Jasper disembodied my kidnapper. I sighed with relief and was about to give into the darkness, when I heard Dr. Cullen.

"Stay with me, Leah. Stay awake." He said prodding my bruised and broken body with a frown.

The pack carried me home. The journey was short but painful. Then I was at Emily s and I looked round for mom and Seth but I got better. His eyes met mine immediately, Derek. His hand touched my face. It was the lightest touch, so gentle so he would not hurt me. I mouthed his name and he smiled, a sad smile. Then he said, the three most wonderful words.

"I love you." He said. "I had a moment of weakness before but I promise to love you every day and I will never leave you again. I m so sorry, Leah" I smiled again and tried to talk but Dr. Cullen interrupted.

"Derek, I need to examine Leah please."

For the next hour, I ignored my medical exam and just stared at Derek and concentrated on his comfortably cool hand in my unbroken hand. Dr. Cullen announced that I would be ok in a week which was just in time for Emily s wedding, not that I cared. All I cared about was Derek. Mom and Seth were worried but I ignored it. I did not even check how Sam and Jacob felt about me being out of action. I did check that Collin was alright though. He had come out better then me. He was sleeping next door and when I blocked out the talk surrounding me, I could hear him, snoring. Slowly, everyone left. I was sleeping at Emily s tonight or rather today as it would be bad to move me. Derek moved closer to me and I smiled sleepily. I really needed sleep.

"Leah, Dr. Cullen said you needed peace, quiet and bed rest but your home would be noisy with Seth. I was thinking about a cabin my family owns about an hour from here. Its completely isolated. I could take care of you there. It would be just you and me. Do you want to go?" He said nervously yet hopeful.

"Yes" I whispered too tired to express fully my joy but he understood. He kissed my forehead very gently and then we slept.

Derek s POV.

Leah looked so badly hurt when they carried her in. I froze and stood stock still. then her eyes met mine. Leah. I touched her very carefully on the face, trying not to injure her. The moment was ours. I forgot about the pack and everyone else in the room. I had to tell her that I was sorry and how I loved her.

"I love you." I said. "I had a moment of weakness before but I promise to love you every day and I will never leave you again" She smiled and I admired her beauty, strength and bravery. I wanted to say more and it looked as if she wanted to say something too but Dr. Cullen interrupted.

"Derek, I need to examine Leah." He said.

I immediately stepped away but put my hand in her unbroken one. It hurt to see her so damaged. She looked very fragile. My eyes never left hers and I ignored Emily, Sam and everyone else. I concentrated on what Dr. Cullen said. I relaxed when he said she would be okay in a week. I was so mad when Emily said.

"Oh, great so Leah can still be part of the wedding." I had given Emily a dirty look and was about to say that her wedding meant nothing that Leah getting better was the most important thing but Sam saw me and growled. It had been a tense moment, I might not have been strong but I was mad for Leah. Then Leah squeezed my hand and I turned away and looked at her again.

I will look after her so well. Leah will be pampered, she deserves a rest. I wondered if she needed more medication but she looked peaceful. I felt her relax gradually as everyone left. Eventually, it was just me and Leah. I carefully slid down next to her and put my arm round her. She was so delicate and fragile. Then I asked her.

"Leah, Dr. Cullen said you needed peace, quiet and bed rest but your home would be noisy with Seth. I was thinking about a cabin my family owns about an hour from here. Its completely isolated. I could take care of you there. It would be just you and me. Do you want to go?" I asked. I was nervous and I really wanted her to say yes but I did not want to pressurise her.

"Yes" She whispered. Even from this simple answer, I could tell she felt the same joy but she wa stired. I was tired too but I wanted to wait until she was asleep before I slept. She fell asleep quickly and I joined her shortly after.

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Leah s recovery week was slow but good. We did not get to go to my cabin as Emily needed Leah for the wedding but I watched amazed as Leah grew stronger every day. I baked her my special brownies. Dad owning a food company, I had learnt how to make great brownies. She loved them and so did Seth and the pack. When Leah was busy with Emily doing bridemaid stuff, I hung out with Seth and Edward Cullen. Seth and Edward were good friends. I met Edward when he came with Dr. Cullen to check up on Leah. Edward was nice and I felt I owed him for killing Leah s kidnapper. I even taught Edward how to make my brownies. It was a strange friendship because Leah found Edward barely passable and she hated Bella Cullen but this didn t bother Edward so I just did not mention Bella and he did not mention Leah. I also brought Leah some new clothes and a couple of Cds in the hope that it would help her to stay in bed. Leah was too restless to be settled by clothes and music and now it was the day of the wedding.

I sat next to Seth and Clio. Leah, Seth, Clio and I got on quite well. Clio was so much like Seth in character as Leah said they were both so sweet and kind. The church was small but it was obvious that a lot of thought had gone into decorations. I could barely see the alter with Jacob, Embry and Quil sitting in front of us. Then the music started. It was wonderful. First Claire and her sister came out as the flower-girls in pretty pink dresses. Claire got halfway down the aisle before she was distracted by Quil then her sister pushed her the rest of the way. Next came Leah, she looked so beautiful that I did not even look at the bride. I just followed her progress down the aisle. She smiled as she caught me smiling. Through out the wedding, I watched Leah, she however managed to keep an eye on Sam and Emily, although she did wink at me a couple of times. Then they walked down the aisle. Sam and Emily looked so happy together then Leah was next to me.

"Ready to go?" She said. I drove Leah to the reception where she left me again to play maid of honour and bridesmaid. It was not until eleven that she finally came back until then I was stuck with the younger wolves who stole my food and my slice of the wedding cake. I was hungry. She sat on my lap and my heart swelled, I forgot my hunger in her beauty.

"I m so tired." She said sighing softly.

"So, do you want your surprise now? It would mean we would have to leave now?" I said, she looked at me with interest then nodded.

I pulled a blindfold out of my pocket and tied round her eyes then lead her to my car. She sat in. I made sure her seatbelt was tied then I started the car. We drove for an hour, the roads were quiet and so was leah. I had expected her to complain about the blindfold but she did not. When we got there, I carried her out and up the porch. The outside of the cabin was exactly the same as it had been three years ago only Alice had lit the outdoor lamps. Alice, Edwards sister had insisted on organising the surprise and when I opened the door, I was glad I let her. The room smelled of roses and Alice had made a heart out of rose petals on the bed. There was a bottle of champagne on the tavle and the ceiling had many glow in the dark stars. The effect was stunning. I pulled off her blindfold. Leah just stared in silence for a few minutes. I was beginning to think she did not like it. Then she turned round and said softly. "Thank you, Derek " Before I kissed her I wanted to ask a question.

"Leah, you cannot have children so it would not matter if we did not use protection." I said smiling. Leah hated the fact that she could not have children, I did too but it had advantages.

"Yes, that is true." She said smiling and then we kissed and fell on the bed.

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The next few days were the best days of my life until Wednesday. Leah got sick and she said her stomach was warm. We were supposed to leave on Thursday but I decided to leave a day early in case Leah was seriously ill. I called Carlisle on the way home. Leah just said

"My stomach feels weird and warm." I felt it, it was definetly warm and slightly swolen. Maybe she had an infection. Dr. Cullen was waiting for us at when we came to his house. He started examining Leahs stomach and took an x-ray, then suddenly she groaned in pain and shook. I grabbed her hand and she squeezed. After a second , she relaxed again. .Dr. Cullen muttered. "It could not be". He asked Leah for another X-ray. We had to wait half an hour before both X-ray results came back. I was so worried inside but for Leah, I pretended it was okay.

"Good news. Unbelievable really." Dr. Cullen said.

"What" I yelled. I was so worried about Leah and he was just telling me her illness was unbelievable.

"Leah is pregnant with a werewolf. The first x-ray shows a normal baby while the second x-ray which was taken after Leah started shaking and screaming shows a baby wolf." Dr. Cullen explained. He carried on. "Obviously, this explains the heat of the belly and the swelling. Leah looks two months pregnant. The baby is growing as quickly as Nessie did. Leah being the only female werewolf in history means you could not have known it could happen but your child is completely unique or at the moment rather your werewolf cub is completely unique."

I looked at him then Leah who was equally surprised then fainted.


	5. Chapter 5

Leah s POV.

I was pregnant. It seemed to good to be true. I did not care that the baby was a werewolf. It didn't t matter. I had a child and I was carrying part of Derek in me. Derek looked at me, then fainted. This was too weird for him, now he would run away and leave. Dr. Cullen looked at me. I felt my slightly swollen too warm stomach. "A baby" I whispered. Dr. Cullen sat Derek down. Derek stayed still for a second then he smiled, it was the most beautiful smile and I hoped our child got that smile.

"How big is it?" Derek asked.

"About two months. The child is growing at werewolf speed so I would think it should be ready to come out in a month." Dr. Cullen said.

I was too shocked to say anything. I had never thought I could be pregnant and now at just eighteen, I was with a werewolf. Oh my gosh, the gossip would be dreadful. La Push would think I got knocked up months ago when in four weeks, I have a child. Mom would be delighted, she had always thought that Seth would be her only hope for grandchildren. What would Derek s parents think? Or could we even tell them when about the baby since our child was a wolf. I did not have a lot of money, Dad left me a bit when he died but that was it. I had never thought that I would have to provide for two.

"Derek, how can we afford it?" I asked, worried now.

"Hush, Leah. Relax. I have a lot of money, more then I need, more then we need. My Aunt left me a large fortune when I was ten and I have not spend a single penny of it and I have been working for the last two years. Also, I bought an apartment last week, I was going to ask you to move in." Derek said. He was shy. He surely did not think there was a question of me not moving in. "Do you want to move in?" He asked nervously. I almost screamed.

"Of course." Then the intense pain started again, I held my stomach and squeezed Derek s hand but not so much that I would break it. The wolf cub was back to a baby.

"Lets go home." Derek said and drove me back. I got nervous as I thought about telling Mom and Seth.

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Mom was ecstatic and Seth was happy too. We decided that Derek s parents would remain in the dark

Until it was safe to tell them. Being pregnant meant no school, patrolling or debutant stuff. It also meant boredom. Today was Tuesday. Derek and Seth were in school and Mom was at work. Emily and Rachel sometimes came over to keep me company but they were going shopping today and I knew they would not be back for hours. I decided to go to the kitchen and get something to eat, having a baby wolf growing inside you made you hungry. I checked for Derek s brownies. There was none left but I found a yoghurt instead.

The doorbell rang. It was probably the postman. I got up slowly and carefully covered my stomach to hide the bump. I was supposed to be sick. I opened the door and stared.

"Hey" Sam said . I was surprised. We usually avoided each other as it was awkward and up until a month ago, I had been depressed and he was responsible. Also I had not seen him for a long time because Jacob had thankfully organised that we were never patrolling at the same time.

"Hi. What s up?" I said. We both knew it was not a casual visit and I bet it was not coincidental that Emily was out of town either and I did not think it was pack stuff otherwise Jacob would come, not Sam.

"Nothing much. Can I come in?" He said. Even after all this time and Derek, I still found my heart was beating at an irregular pace.

I let him in silently, too shocked to speak. We went into the sitting room. I did not think anything had changed since when he used to come over every day and we use to sit on that couch together. I stopped there. I looked at him. He was still handsome. Age was not a problem for werewolves. I knew every inch of that beautiful face but now it was not my favourite face. I thought of Derek and smiled. Sam broke the long silence.

He coughed. "Leah, I came to give you back this actually before the baby and before you moved out." he reached into his pocket and he pulled out a sea-shell necklace. I smiled, a small sad smile. I had made a lot of them when Sam and I were together, when we broke up I stopped because they were reminders of him.

"You made this one, when we are at First Beach and it was the night that I told you I loved you for the very first time. Do you remember LeeLee?" Sam said, caught up in the memory. I did remember very well. I had clung on to these memories pathetically after the break up. It had been one of the most magical nights of my life. Sam was seen by the other wolves as tough but inside he was soft, gentle and incredibly romantic. We had laid down in the sand and watched the stars. Even now, the memory was sweet.

"Yes, I remember. It took you so long to say I love you." I said quietly, looking into his eyes. He smiled

"I was afraid that you would not love me back." He said softly. We had been so good together, if the world of vampires and werewolves did not exist, Sam and I would be together and so would Jacob and Bella.

"Lee-Lee, I know you think that when we broke up that I forgot about you and when straight to Emily but that was not how it happened. I was just as hurt as you. I was a werewolf for a year before you were so you could not see my pain for the first six months after we broke up. I felt guilty for betraying you but more than that I loved you and it hurt to let you go." He said and looked at me. I was surprised, like Sam said, I had thought I was the only one to suffer. "Then you imprinted with Derek, that hurt a lot because I hated to see you with another guy even though I want you to be happy. Now, you are carrying his child , I always imagined you carrying mine." He said, this truthfully and without shame. I had always imagined my children would be with Sam but I had watched him marry another woman. This was not fair. I was finally happy and then Sam comes along and tells me he is in pain when I had to watch him marry my cousin and love her for ages before I met Derek and got my happy ending.

"Sam" I began. He interrupted. "Leah, when you were held hostage by that vampire, do you know what I realised, I could not remember the last time we kissed." This stopped my anger at him, I remembered it perfectly, how could he not? I took his hand and led him into the hall.

"We kissed here for the last time. We were wet after cliff-diving and you pushed me against the wall and you promised to love me forever." I said, trying to keep my voice steady over the last words.

Sam s arm wrapped round my waist and suddenly we were against the wall. "Like this?" He said and then his husky voice was whispering in my ear. "I did not break that promise, Leah. I still love you." My heart was flying and my hands automatically went around his neck. I was pleased to find that Sam and I still bonded well together. Then his lips met mine.

Fireworks exploded in my body. His kisses were different from Derek s, not bad different just different. I wanted to push him away and tell him to go home but I could not. We loved our imprints but we also loved each other. Our imprint love was much more powerful but it did not mean that our love did not exist. I loved Derek more and Sam loved Emily more but still we loved each other. Oh my gosh, Emily. Sam was married and I was pregnant with Derek s child. This realisation made me pull away. Sam stood back, we looked at each other, both of us were breathing heavily.

"Go home, Sam" I said, even though I wanted him to stay and love me and kiss me more. It hurt to tell him to go but it would have been unbearable for Derek to leave. "Do not tell anyone about what happened and don t think about it or me."

"Lee- Lee." Sam began, this time I interrupted. "I love Derek and you love Emily. What happened here was a momentary lapse in judgement. You are married and I am pregnant and in the end, I would choose Derek over you and you would choose Emily over me. That's just the way it is." I said but I did not look at him, afraid that I would see his love for me.

"Your right. " He said and repeated it for his own benefit. "You are right. Goodbye Leah." He said and he leaned forward again. This time, I resisted and pulled back. He looked at me, rejected and left. As he left, I realised that he had taken part of me with him, part of my heart.

Derek s POV.

I was going to be a father and Leah would be a mother. It was great, our child would be so well cared for and loved. I bet its going to be a girl, I hope she looks like Leah but Leah is sure it is going to be a boy but we shall see. Man, I hate school, its so boring without Leah. I had started easting with the La Push gang and Clio. I barely saw my old school friends except for Matt. Matt had been my best friend since I was ten, we had seen each other through some tough times. Matt also loved soccer, we were the teams best players, Matt was small but he had unbelievable speed and skill. Matt had met Leah and liked her. He also got on great with Seth and Clio. The bell rang and I sighed in relief, it was lunch. Classes were unbearably long and I did nothing in them besides think of Leah and our child. I would make her more brownies when I got home.

"Derek, wait up." I looked round and saw Matt running down the corridor towards me.

"Hey, what s up?" I asked, Matt looked slightly stressed as he caught up with me. The juniors glared at us, Matt had hit some of them with his massive school bag in his haste to get to me.

"Nothing much. I heard Dan and a couple of the other guys from the team talking. They are blaming you for our last two defeats." Matt said. I had not been to any of the soccer trainings or the matches since I met Leah. I missed soccer but I way preferred to spend my time with Leah. I was one of the teams best players and I had been captain but it was not my fault they had lost their matches.

"Matt, the team was here before me and will be here after me." I said.

"Derek, Dan wants you to play really bad, he said his dad had arranged for some university scouts to come to the game tomorrow and that our team had to win. He said without you, we would lose and that we needed you to play and we need to win." Luckily, I was spared from answering as Seth and Clio came up. The four of us, eat lunch together and I completely forgot about the team and soccer until the evening.

My last class was Physics. I was dreadful at it and so was my teacher. I had only taken it because I had not known what to take and Matt was taking it. Matt and I spent the whole class throwing paper airplanes at Embry and Quil. It was fun until we got caught and had to stay back afterwards and of course Quil and Embry had not been caught so got to leave straight away. We wandered out after fifteen minutes of listening to our teacher complain about our grades and our behavior. Five guys were waiting for us. It was Dan and some of the other guys from the team.

"Sullivan." Dan yelled and smiled. I remembered Matt s warning but did not take heed of it.

"Hey Dan." I said

"Haven t seen you in ages. You ve been hanging with the La Push gang." Dan said the La Push gang with venom.

"They are not a gang. We are just friends." I shrugged, trying to sound casual.

"Rumour has it that you are going out with that chick Leah Clearwater." Tony said smiling only the smile was not sweet. Before I could respond and tell him Leah was not some chick, Matt spoke.

"Derek, come on. We are late, we will see you guys later." Matt was obviously eager to leave and I was too. Dan stretched his arm and blocked our path. It was at this point that I realised Dan and his group had me and Matt surrounded. It was five against two, not good odds, I thought. I looked round hoping to see that Embry or Quil had waited for us but no-one was there. The corridor was empty.

"So, are you playing tomorrow?" Dan asked, it was a threat. It shocked me because I used to be friends with these guys. I had seen Dan and his gang beat up people before but I had never had to fear them. I nodded and tensed my muscles waiting for the beating.

"Good because you have missed a lot of games but you had better be there tomorrow." Dan said. Tony and Harry grabbed my arms and pushed me against the locker. There was a clash as I felt the metal on my back and then another clash as Matt was pinned down too. " Understood?" Dan said. I nodded. I did not try to break free, it would just make it worst. I felt the punch but did not resist it. I rolled with it and did not noise. Noise did not help. I could see Tony going for another hit but Dan stopped him.

"Leave them. They need to be in good shape for tomorrow and if we don t win or if you don t turn up, it will be a lot worse. " Dan said and left. I lay on the floor for a second and watched them leave. I had been lucky, I had only got a punch to the face. My black eye from Sam had been almost completely healed and now I had another to take its place. Great.

"You ok?" Matt asked. I nodded and looked at Matt. Matt had not needed the beating, he still played with the team but he also had started to hang out with me and the La Push gang. Matt had been warned not to follow me and also he had been beaten because I knew and Dan knew that Matt would have tried to fight for me if he had not been held down.

"Thanks." I said gruffly, embarrassed as we climbed into the car. I could feel the blood in my mouth and my eye bruising but I was thankful, it could have been worse a lot worse. Matt dropped me off at Leah s house.

"Do you need a lift to the game tomorrow?" Matt asked. I nodded, I had to play tomorrow to save my face and Matt s because if I did not come tomorrow, Matt would get my beating. I watched Matt drive away with blood dripping from his nose, he was a good friend. I turned to Leah s house, maybe Leah could see a way out of this but at least she would clean me up. I wiped some blood off my mouth with my sleeve and knocked on the door.

Leah opened it and stared. My face obviously looked a lot worse then it felt. Then she spoke.

"You fought with Sam" She said. She said it as a statement not a question but why would I fight with Sam? "Derek, Sam and I did kiss this morning but it meant nothing. Why did you fight him? Derek, I love you, it was just a kiss." She said hurridly. She kept on talking but I zoned out. Leah had kissed Sam, she thought that I had fought with him and that was why I was injured. Leah kissed Sam but he was married. My heart ached, the physical pain was nothing compared to this new emotional pain.

"You kissed Sam?" I said, staring at her, trying to hide my pain and surprise at her betrayal.

She realised at this point that I had not known about the kiss. She stared at me then nodded. I looked at her, Leah had betrayed me but I thought she loved me, I mean she had told me about the whole imprint thing, I was her imprint not Sam so why had she kissed him?

I looked at her again even with tears in her eyes, she was undoubtedly the most beautiful creature the world had ever seen but they were crocodile tears. I turned round and began to jog. Leah grabbed my arm.

"Derek." She began.

"Don t follow me, Leah. I will be back soon for our child but right now I need to think." At this point, a new thought occured to me was the child mine. "Is the baby mine, Leah tell me the truth, is the child mine?"

She nodded because she could no longer speak through her tears. I wanted to comfort her but I had my own pain to deal with. I ran picking up a steady pace, leaving her crying and pregnant.


	6. Chapter 6

Dereks POV.

Leah and Sam. I remembered them together, they had been the perfect couple in secondary school. Everyone had thought they would last forever.  
I had seen them but had not been too interested but I did remember seeing them together. Sam with his arm over Leah. Pain shot through me.  
Did she love me? Did she love him?

I knew I loved her. I really did. I had even thought of marrying her seeing as she was pregnant. The ring was still in my bedroom drawer.  
I had spent nearly all my bank account on it and now she turns round and goes to Sam. I keep running. I try to ignore her but she remains in my head. i remember meeting her, the days in the mountain cabin and then finding out we were starting our own family. Each memory had a bitterness to it. The memories were wonderful but painful. I increased my speed. I ignored the wet rain that pounded against me. i ignored the people who stared at me. I felt like yelling at them for staring. I felt like throwing myself into the water and not coming out. I could just let myself stay under the water, let it overcome me and let it fill my lungs and then have the peace of bleak unconsciousness. I kicked a puddle and the water splashed around. I threw myself down on the sand.

La Push beach had always been a haven for me, just watching the waves crash made me feel relaxed. I used to think every wave was like a problem and that it just crashes into the rocks and disappears now however I wanted to crash into the rocks. Who was she?

Leah had given me the greatest moments of life and now she had given me the most painful moment. I felt wetness on my cheek. It could be rain water but I knew it was a tear. Every thing that went up had to come down and I had been flying high and now I had come back down to earth. I wished I had never met Leah,  
then i would not know this pain. It was pain that I had never felt before,it was intense and I wanted it to stop but it wouldn `t. I immediatly regretted that wish because no matter how much pain I was in now, it was worth it because Leah was everything. Maybe it was time to go back to being that guy who did not know this pain. Maybe I could be that jerk again who never calls girls the next day but I knew inside that the change Leah had brought was pernament. I looked up at the grey skies, a storm was coming. The darkness matched my mood. My muscles ache and in a way it provided relief. If I concentrated on this pain, I did not feel the pain of Leah as much. Images of her and me and Sam ran through my head. I trued to ignore them but it was like trying to stop the waves coming onto the beach, impossible. My life had changed so much in the last month and a half, it was no wonder my grade average had dropped. If I won Leah back, I would take it slow, learn more about her and let her learn more about me and then maybe if i trusted her more, this would not hurt so much. I sighed and stared back up at the darkness.

After a while, I got up off the wet sand shivering. I had a long walk home. Darkness had fallen long ago but I was not afraid of the dark.I picked up a steady pace, I was so glad I had my own apartment now, if I was at home, my parents would be going into cardiac arrest. I kicked stones out of my path. I kept my head down never looking up at the cars that passed by or the houses I passed. I knew my way in the dark and I purposefully kept my head down as I passed Sams house.

He was probably telling Emily that he loved Leah but he loved Emily as an imprint. Leah loved me because she had to not because she actually loved me.  
But she had loved Sam by choice.I had never thought of imprinting like that, I had thought it was a blessing. I had thought it was like the universe and fate had partnered together to give us each other. I reached the apartment block and was about to type in the code when the door opened. i looked up and blinked form the bright light and there she was.  
Leah.

"Derek.I love you, I love you so much more then I ever loved Sam. Derek, you are the one I love, you are the one I cannot survive without. You are the one I care about and you are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with." She said this and stared at me, the whole time. Leah was brave like that she was not afraid of what she would see in my eyes even if it would hurt her. She was so beautiful in this bright light and I was completely soaked and covered in sand and mud.

She moved closer. "Derek, you are freezing." She wrapped herself around me and her warmth enveloped me. I stayed frozen for a minute but then I let her keep me safe and warm. Did she mean those words? I wanted to believe her so badly. I looked at her and saw truth.

"I love you Leah." I whispered into her ear.

"I know and I love you too and I love you more. Do not ever doubt my love for you. We just need each other thats all." Leah said this softly.

"Ok but Leah, this time we have to go slower, I want to take you on a proper first date and I want to get to know you and learn to trust you again, the right way. I mean look at us, we have not even been fighting a day and already we are back together. Don `t get me wrong Lee, I am so happy to be together but I want this to be right for us and for our child." I said.

Leah looked surprised but she did not argue. "Does that mean I am not moving in?" She said. I considered for a moment. I really really wanted Leah to live with me but i also wanted this to be right and to be honest, I was still mad at Leah for kissing Sam.

"Not right now. I will drop you home." I said, hating responsibility and praying this slow idea would pay back.

"Home?" Leah asked and I nodded.

"Ok." She said disappointed. We hopped into the car and Leah just sat silently watching me, it was not like her ususal stare. Usually her stare made me happy, I felt like she was giving me the adoring stare I gave her. Now she was staring at me in confusion, trying to figure me out but I was glad, she said nothing. I pulled into her driveway.

"Thanks. I will pick my car up tomorrow." She said, still looking at me. I nodded.

Then she leaned towards me and I resisted my almost overwhelming impulse to kiss her and leaned backwards. Leah opened her eyes and a pool of sadness was in her eyes. I had rejected her.

"Not tonight, Leah." I said, looking at the steering wheel unable to look at her. If I looked at her, I would never be able to be strong. It was already painful to know I had hurt her, I did not want to see it and also I had wanted that kiss probably more than she did.

"Bye." She said, I could hear how unsteady her voice was, I gripped the steering wheel tighter, staring at it.

"Bye Leah, I will see you tomorrow." I said trying also to keep my voice even. "I will drive your car over around 11. Don `t worry about it."

She nodded, unstrapped the seat belt and climbed out and walked up to the front door. I watched her walk away and it took all my strengh not to call her back or run up to her. The door closed and I stared at it for another couple of seconds then drove away but before, I left I heard a small sob. I revved the engine and drove home.

Everything had changed, we had changed, our love has changed. It was sore and delicate now, I wanted to go back to our innocence and that stupid feeling of happy irrestible love not this harsh cruel love but now, now we couldn `t go back. I could only go forward and hope it works out ok. I did belive me and Leah could be ok again but just not now. I climbed out of the car, slamming the door in rage and locked it. The apartment was dark and empty.

I went straight into the bedroom, ignoring the hunger. I threw myself on the bed and then pulled out a drawer from under the bed. It was a memory box.  
The first picture was Leah with Emily. She was in her bridesmaid dress and looked amazing and so happy. I cursed myself for causing her pain. I threw the picture back in and lay on the bed, willing sleep to come.

Amazingly it did come and like everything in my life right now, it was broken and full of blackness. 


End file.
